Say "Yes!" to the Universe!!!

Nope. I'd rather eat a big, fresh, wet dog turd than be agreeable about anything today. I'm cunty and sour and I want to be unapologetic about it, but that's just not me. I apologize for everything because I'm insincere.

Sour
lemon
puke
cunt

I get these tapes playing in my head when I'm in a bad mood. It's my positive mom-voice trying to be helpful.

"Take deep breaths and count backwards from one hundred."
"In through your nose, out through your mouth."
"Your outer world is a manifestation of your inner world."
"Think of five things you're grateful for."
"Can you think of some strategies to work through these feelings?"

If I could have a temper tantrum in a padded room, I think that might help. If I could smash, really smash my fist into someone's face repeatedly, that's another strategy that might help me work through these feelings. If I could pour boiling water down my throat and scald my insides, my outer world be an accurate reflection of my inner world.

I don't know. There are people fighting in the courtyard outside my house, a man shouting at a woman to shut the fuck up and the woman begging him to come back inside.

Now it sounds like someone is beating up a shopping cart.



I ate so many grapes tonight.